Sunday afternoon 42-year-old Enrico Colon-Conde decided he would go for a stroll in the park in Kissimmee, Florida, which was crowded, full of gleeful kids running around the playground and their parents keeping an eye on things.

Too bad Enrico is a douchebag pedophile.

Enrico tried talking to the kids, asking them for their phone numbers because he thought they were cute and wanted to have a connection with them. He then picked up a five-year-old girl to help her onto the slide and stuck his hand in her skirt. After he was finished with her he sat down next to a ten-year-old girl and grabbed her breasts.

By this time several of the parents had noticed and Colon-Conde tried to run away. Fortunately the group of parents turned into a “mob” which chased him down and then surrounded the scumbucket until police could arrive. Too bad they didn’t give him an old-fashioned ass whooping while they were at it.

Officers arrested Enrico and charged him with Lewd and Lascivious Molestation. He’s currently lodged in the Osceola County jail with no bond.

Hat tip to Me ToSee for the story.

39-year-old Florida Highway Patrolman Wilfredo “Jay” Bennett has been charged with Unlawful Compensation for Official Behavior after he allegedly fixed a traffic ticket for sex and got caught. Nice mug shot, huh?

Bennett has been accused of breaking his oath to uphold the law when he fixed a traffic ticket in exchange for sex with 23-year-old Donna Herbst, a woman who got into a car crash last September. He allegedly told the woman that if she fixed him dinner she could contest the ticket and he wouldn’t show up in court.

The two apparently started having sex on a regular basis, including times when Bennett was on duty, until he was caught when his wife dialed the unknown number that showed up on her husband’s phone. She introduced herself to Herbst and the two women confronted Bennett at his private business location, 1st Stryke Security and Investigations, in Kissimmee, Florida. Ooops. Never piss off your girlfriend and wife at the same time. NOT a good move. The blurb off of the newsletter from 1st Stryke includes this gem,

…STRYKE uses private investigators to assist individuals, businesses and attorneys by finding and analyzing information. They connect small clues to solve mysteries or to uncover facts about legal, financial or personal matters. 1st STRYKE offers many services including pre-employment verification and individual background profiles. We also provide assistance in criminal and civil liability cases, insurance claims and fraud, child custody and protection cases, missing persons cases, and premarital screening. We are hired to investigate individuals to prove or disprove infidelity. Our investigators will utilize high-tech equipment to perform the tasks at hand. Some of these tools include…

Funny…When I peruse the list of tools it doesn’t say anything about just letting the wifey look through your cell phone to dial your ho…just sayin’. Shit like that will put a good investigator out of business.

Bennet doesn’t seem to have an updated MySpace page but there are a couple of accounts associated with his email address. Nothing much but you can find them here and here.

Bennett was booked into the Osceola County Jail last Thursday and bonded out a short time later. If convicted Bennett, who has been with the Florida Highway Patrol for twelve years, faces up to fifteen years in prison and a $10,000 fine.

Hell, I guess if I could get out of a ticket by sleeping with a cop I might…just not that one.

Source

52-Year-Old Gustavo Agosto of Kissimmee, Florida was arrested and charged with Lewd and Lascivious Molestation of a Victim Under the Age of 12 and Possession of Obscene Material this past Friday.

Agosto allegedly touched two sisters aged 10 and 11 inappropriately while he showed them porn on a computer.

The girl’s mother found out about Agosto’s activities and reported them to police in Osceola County earlier in the day. Agosto is being held without bond in the Osceola County Jail.

Updated 1/13/10:

Apparently Gustavo is a member of the Central Florida Christian Writers and Bloggers meetup group in addition to a couple of other meetup groups. That’s a frigging joke. According to his profile “Because there’s a burning fire in me by God him self to write and touch one life at a time. Especially at trouble time like this one”

Obviously he wanted to touch but I don’t think anyone’s god had to do with it.

He’s also written a self-published book which I won’t link to. You can find it if you visit his profile though. Anyway, the blurb says,

Someone’s Diary is the story of a well-educated, sensitive man of strong character with firm convictions. It is a diary – the personal diary of Gustavo Agosto. In it you will find all the elements of a Shakespearian play. There is tragedy, deceit, revenge, hostility, sorrow, and emotional distress. Above all, you will find a man who seeks to be happy and fulfilled. He wants what we all want – to be loved.

Sounds like a crock of shit to me but what the hell do I know?

You can find his MySpace profile here.

Source

Florida officials issued an Amber Alert for a missing 2-year-old in Osceola County.

Anyone with information about Derrick or his father are asked to contact the Kissimmee Police Department at 407-847-0176