22-year-old Justin James Warren Green of Birmingham, Alabama was arrested for Child Abuse last Friday. As a side note, what the hell is up with the two first and two last names? Anyway, as I said Green was arrested last Friday after he allegedly slapped his two-year-old daughter for eating his Pringles.
Someone in the family apparently has at least half a brain because the little girl was taken to St. Vincent’s East last week with a large hand print and abrasion on the left side of her face. The hospital called the law and social service workers. Green also showed up at the hospital but the staff escorted his Pringle-loving ass out of there.
The DA felt like the asshole deserved to have charges filed against him and after he confessed to deputies on Friday that he hit his daughter for eating his Barbecue Pringles he was charged with Willful Abuse of a Child and lodged in the local jail on $10,000 bond. He made bond earlier today. You dumbass, don’t you know you don’t slap people over Barbecue Pringles? Only the sour cream and onion deserve that sort of behavior.
“Pyro’s” MySpace status says “Do WhAt yOu FeEl iN yOuR hEaRt NoT wHaT oThErS mAkE yOu FeEl YoU sHoUlD FeEl” Perhaps you should get some different advice dude like maybe go to anger management classes or something. Perhaps a bit of grammar would help as well the next time you decide to go all philosophical and shit.
